Pandemic Parenting - Tips & Tricks on How To Manage Back-to-School Anxiety

As a parent, you’ve already had enough on your plate. With household chores, work, making sure the kids get to school and activities on time, let alone taking time for yourself, you’re doing it all. It makes sense that you would be stressed on a normal day, but throw in a pandemic and a whole new list of stressors comes with it. There are lots of resources available but we have noticed there isn’t much for parents dealing with the stress of caring for their children during these uncertain times. Because you’re important too and influence the way your child will handle the stress of this time, we’ve compiled a little list of tips and tricks for you!

Kids have already gone back to school and you’ve had a chance to see what that looks like. Many of the COVID plans for schools were unclear and could be hard for parents to follow given all their responsibilities. 

First things first: Review your expectations for the school year

Whose expectations are they? Are they yours or someone else's? Are your expectations based on what is possible today or what might have been possible in the past? Are your expectations based on what is possible or only on what you hope will happen? Make sure your expectations are realistic so that you’re setting yourself up for success. 

Next, Even if your expectations seem realistic, make sure that you’re expecting something that you have control over.

People tend to feel stressed when they’re in situations where they lack control. If the success of your day-to-day life with kids going back to school during a pandemic is based on others’ behaviour, you may be disappointed. Maybe plan an event that you can help make happen. For example, you may not have control of how the school operates, but you can plan to do something special as a family at home. 

Let others know what your expectations are and ask for help if you need it.

Don’t assume people will automatically know what you need or what from them. Tell your kids what you need their help with. The responsibility of the tasks will give them a sense of pride and confidence. Ask your partner or friends for help when you need it. 

“You’re not alone”

Kids are going to be feeling stressed during these times too. It’s important to share with kids that they are not alone in this feeling and share how they can help. With that being said, if your emotions are really heightened, you may need to be careful how much you expose to your kids. Some kids may want to know everything about what school will look like and what to expect. Other kids may not want to talk about it and only be told minimal information. Kids may be far more worried about the regular worries of school, like who is in their class, who they are sitting next to, who their teacher is. Ask your child about their fears, validate them, and help them problem-solve. 

Let them feel how they feel

Since extracurricular activities and other events may not be able to happen due to COVID, kids are gonna be bummed. Let them feel disappointed and acknowledge it. Again, if it's possible, plan some activities they are able to do during this time. Even if it’s not the same, it’ll give them something to look forward to and be excited about. 

Pace yourself

Take on what you can manage. You might see some parents creating their own curriculum and doing special projects round the clock. Remember your expectations for YOURSELF. Do the best you can within your means and limits. 

Review your coping strategies

Think of times throughout the week that might bring up feelings of anxiety, stress, and/or depression. Plan what coping skills you will use to manage your feelings at those times. Try to choose coping strategies that leave you feeling better in the short term and long term. Time out (even for a short time)for physical or relaxation exercises, a walk, or hobbies can be great ways of coping with stress and are good lifestyle practices in general. 

Focus on what really matters.

Think of what really matters to you at this time. Is it making sure your child has their schoolwork completed? Is it your child’s health and happiness your priority? I know these are all important things, but try to think of what is the highest priority to you and focus on that.

Even during a pandemic, you have control over some things

Remind yourself and your kids that you have control over some things. Wearing a mask, washing your hands, and being empathetic toward people (you never know their situation) are some things you have control over. Everyone has a different journey during this pandemic. We are all in the same storm but we are not all in the same boat.